Handling Challenging Family Situations

There are several issues to recognize and understand in this challenging situation:

  1. Although intellectually, Mr. Martino’s wife may very well have expected this situation to arise and know exactly what her husband’s wishes were, intense emotions – anticipatory grief, fear, other emotions - may not reflect this intellectual understanding.
  2. The physician needs to explore these emotions and empathize. Consideration and inquiry about cultural or spiritual factors may also be important.
  3. The physician’s duty is to honor to the best of his/ her ability, the wishes of the patient, Mr. Martino, as clearly expressed, documented and understood by his wife.
  4. Support for Mr. Martino’s wife and daughter are available and should be requested; think about resources to assist and offer to contact:
    • Family, friends, or other sources of personal support.
    • Hospital chaplain or social worker.
    • Special pediatric support services team (e.g. at Y.N.H.H., “Child Life”).

Examples of “what to say” or how to start a conversation in this difficult situation.

Recommended readings